Buy a van. Better yet, buy a scaffold lorry

So why buy a van? Well the advantages are superb.

Let's start with a basic pickup. This comes with immunity from speeding fines. You can travel anywhere, at any speed, totally immune from prosecution. This must be so as I get overtaken by these, often doing 45 in a 30 zone. OK, it's not a totally practical family vehicle and the kids will get wet in the open space at the back but as a means of getting where you want to go quickly, it does the job.

Moving up one notch - buy a van. These come with the basic speeding immunity as with pickups but with an added major benefit. You can park them almost anywhere. Free! Double yellows? No problem - you're unloading. 90mph down the motorway, no problem. Do what you want, park where you want AND take the family, all 12 of them, to the seaside in the back. What value.

If money is no object though, go for the ultimate. Buy a scaffold lorry. These come with speeding and parking immunity PLUS you can park in the middle of traffic lights, roundabouts - absolutely anywhere. Blocking a main trunk road? No issue whatsoever. It's a scaffold lorry so perfectly legal. Going the wrong way in a one way street? Perfectly legal in one of these.

So there you have it, the best vehicle choices for the hard of thinking. AND for a limited period only, with any of the above you also now get freedom to jump traffic lights. Not just amber gambling but full blown 'go ahead on red'.

Commercial vehicles - the future!